Well there went January! I meant to make more than one post however, just can't get my mind and fingers to work together.
I think a lot about things I would love to blog about...you know, journal-like but when I sit down at the computer it doesn't pan out.
What I start to type seems more like complaining than a story or summary of happenings.
Lately due to all of the appointments we miss out on play dates or beautiful relaxing days.
I am very much overwhelmed and most days physically and mentally exhausted.
Right now, with Logan we are preparing to meet with the school system because when he turns 3 he will age out of the Early Intervention Program.
This means filling out more paper work, more meetings, more evaluations and more change.
Intimidating for anyone but especially for Logan since he is "thrown" into it.
Of course not really, but to him he is.
I know everything is a process and this journey will be bumpy. For me it is hard. I love my child more than anything and want the best for him.
Many days my brain is scrambled with all the things I think and worry about for him. Then I worry what all that distraction and worry does for the other two.
There are days where I think, I got this and then others where it all hits the fan. I know this is typical with kids in general, but it doesn't help when all that seems to shine are the frustrations/challenges of Logan.
I then yell at myself to stop the pity party!! We have a healthy, (mostly) happy child. We have no terminal diagnosis or anything dramatically life changing.
Our day to day is more of a roller coaster than I could ever of imagined.
There are times I see him, and am in awe of all he is. Then comes the times where I look at him and want to cry for him. I want to cry about all of the unknowns.
Even though there are always unknowns in life but his seem much more intimidating for me.
When times are intimidating it still doesn't take away my awareness of how far he has come since last May. This last year is far from what we "expected." (What year is?!)
We gauge Logan's progress differently now and some days that is hard.
Aidan is starting to notice more and has more frustrations about it. He doesn't understand why Logan gets all this extra special times with his therapists. To Aidan, Logan is getting extra special attention and treatment.
Daniel will never know any difference but he is quickly gaining on Logan and can do many things Logan has trouble with.
Some days are just hard.
They're supposed to be though.
It makes us who we are and ultimately better people.
This is a constant battle with me most everyday.
In the meantime here are some videos of our Sweet Wild Men showing us their smarts.
Aidan is always asking us how to spell things so I asked him about some of his favorite things to spell.
This video shows how far Logan has come. I saw him with a puzzle and he was willing to interact with me. For one of the few times he kept it up even after I got the camera! :)
Here's a little video of DHR and his sweet little voice.
He is always telling us some secret.
I think a lot about things I would love to blog about...you know, journal-like but when I sit down at the computer it doesn't pan out.
What I start to type seems more like complaining than a story or summary of happenings.
Lately due to all of the appointments we miss out on play dates or beautiful relaxing days.
I am very much overwhelmed and most days physically and mentally exhausted.
Right now, with Logan we are preparing to meet with the school system because when he turns 3 he will age out of the Early Intervention Program.
This means filling out more paper work, more meetings, more evaluations and more change.
Intimidating for anyone but especially for Logan since he is "thrown" into it.
Of course not really, but to him he is.
I know everything is a process and this journey will be bumpy. For me it is hard. I love my child more than anything and want the best for him.
Many days my brain is scrambled with all the things I think and worry about for him. Then I worry what all that distraction and worry does for the other two.
There are days where I think, I got this and then others where it all hits the fan. I know this is typical with kids in general, but it doesn't help when all that seems to shine are the frustrations/challenges of Logan.
I then yell at myself to stop the pity party!! We have a healthy, (mostly) happy child. We have no terminal diagnosis or anything dramatically life changing.
Our day to day is more of a roller coaster than I could ever of imagined.
There are times I see him, and am in awe of all he is. Then comes the times where I look at him and want to cry for him. I want to cry about all of the unknowns.
Even though there are always unknowns in life but his seem much more intimidating for me.
When times are intimidating it still doesn't take away my awareness of how far he has come since last May. This last year is far from what we "expected." (What year is?!)
We gauge Logan's progress differently now and some days that is hard.
Aidan is starting to notice more and has more frustrations about it. He doesn't understand why Logan gets all this extra special times with his therapists. To Aidan, Logan is getting extra special attention and treatment.
Daniel will never know any difference but he is quickly gaining on Logan and can do many things Logan has trouble with.
Some days are just hard.
They're supposed to be though.
It makes us who we are and ultimately better people.
This is a constant battle with me most everyday.
In the meantime here are some videos of our Sweet Wild Men showing us their smarts.
Aidan is always asking us how to spell things so I asked him about some of his favorite things to spell.
This video shows how far Logan has come. I saw him with a puzzle and he was willing to interact with me. For one of the few times he kept it up even after I got the camera! :)
Here's a little video of DHR and his sweet little voice.
He is always telling us some secret.
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